NYDailyMail - Animal welfare experts are trying to figure out what’s causing dozens of dolphins to get stranded on the beaches in Cape Cod this month. A whopping 59 dolphins have been found onshore as of Tuesday, experts say. Of those 59, rescuers have been able to release 19 back in the water, Kerry Branon of the International Fund for Animal Welfare, which oversees the rescues, told the Daily News. Experts said the sheer number of dolphins stranding is unusual — even for an area that has seen dolphins wash ashore for centuries. “I’ve been doing this for 15 years and this is only the second season I’ve seen it like this,” Katie Moore, manager of the International Fund for Animal Welfare’s Marine Mammal Rescue and Research Program, told the Boston Globe.
You know why you’ve never seen anything like this Katie Moore? It’s because there’s
never been anyone on the internet that’s willing
to take a stand against dolphins
like I am. And I don’t mean to
keep beating a dead horse, but this story only confirms what I feared. These dolphins are coming for me. It’s not a coincidence that I come back out of unofficial retirement on this site,
publish an article about dolphins, and then these fuckers start kamikaze beaching themselves right in my own back yard. The Cape ain’t far from here, so I’m pretty sure the dolphin race is sending out scout dolphins to pinpoint exactly where I am. I’m a threat to these raping assholes and they’re trying to snuff me out. But I will never, and I repeat NEVER, back down to these porpoise fucks. For decades they’ve cashed in on their cuteness and gotten away with raping humans every chance they got. I’m not sitting back and letting it happen. If I convert one person with these hyperbolic rants then I’ll have done my job. I see you dolphins, I know you’re coming for me, but I’m not going anywhere.
PS – Check out the bitch crying in this picture. Really? You’re crying? My beliefs on dolphins aside, you’re gonna cry because a bunch of the dumb dolphins decided to crash on the beaches of Cape Cod in the winter? Get the fuck out of here with that shit.
