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U.S. Military Trains Dolphins to Spy on Terrorists…The End of the World is Near
Well fuck. This has to be the scariest news I’ve heard since I got the results back from my doctor. Make no mistake about it, the military training dolphins to be spies will be the unraveling of mankind as we know it. We already know how smart these porpoise pricks are, but now they’re getting military training? This is terrible news. Not only were these animals raping and pillaging in the water before the training, but now they’re actually more precise than sonar? We humans don’t stand a chance. At some point I have to put my foot down. I for one will not be taking part in making these rapists smarter, and anyone that does should be charged with treason to the human race. Dolphins are smarter than most humans, and now with the proper military training, it’s only a matter of time before we’re bowing down to Flipper and friends. The Planet of the Apes could never happen, but if you don’t think dolphins could one day rule the world, you are naive my friend.
