Huffington Post - Rather than say “The Devil made me do it,” a Wisconsin man arrested on domestic abuse charges told police that a ghost punched his wife, authorities said. Police responded to the disturbance call at approximately 8 p.m., Sunday, according to a Fond du Lac County Sheriff’s report obtained by The Smoking Gun. At the scene they found 41-year-old Michael West and his wife, who told cops that her husband twice attempted to strangle her and struck her in the face when she attempted to contact 911. West told authorities that his wife sustained injuries as a result of several falls, The Northwestern reports. When an officer pressed the issue, West allegedly changed his alibi, opting instead for a supernatural excuse — “A ghost did it.” West is charged with domestic abuse, strangulation, battery, disorderly conduct, and resisting arrest. He remains in custody in lieu of $1,000 bail.
Michael West, you sand-bagging sonofabitch! This has to take the cake for one of the best domestic abuse excuses ever. I’m never gonna sit here and say that someone should get out of jail if they are found guilty of hitting their wife. But if there’s ever a time where someone’s excuse for hitting their wife should get the charges dropped, then it’s this instance. It’s just a great line,“a ghost did it.” It’s so perfect. It can be applied to literally anything. Why were you smoking weed? “A ghost did it.” Why did you steal that car? “A ghost did it.” Why are you strangling your wife? “A fucking ghost did it.” How can you prove otherwise? Sure, their may be witnesses or physical evidence that can prove your guilt, but can anyone disprove that a ghost really did it? Some kind of spiritual entity could have done it, and that’s all I’d need to know if I was on a jury. It’s the job of the state to prove within a reasonable doubt that someone is guilty of said crime. If they can’t prove a ghost didn’t do it then you must acquit. I’ll be waiting anxiously to see if this excuse works, but you better believe that I’m trying it out the next time I have a run in with the cops.